Many years ago I was attending a Women’s Rite’s Retreat with the sublime Anna Davidovich and in a throwaway comment, she gifted me with one of the most profound teachings I have ever received.
Her simple sentence changed my life.
While the words she said are not exactly the words, I’m about to give you now, the simplicity and power of this sentence has the capacity to awaken one of the most profound blueprints of your soul. I kid you not.
But before I tell you what she said I have to let you know that the woman who she said these words to is not the woman who is writing this now. Back then I was about the most disembodied (that is out of my out of my body-ed, um try ungrounded), super sensitive empath who took EVERYTHING personally.
I had skin as thick as a wet paper bag.
Basically, I was an over-giver who was continually overwhelmed by acute psychic perception (no filter) and highly sensitive emotions. I was also compulsively transparent and had no boundaries. My heart was an open book – to everyone. I mean everyone. My friends, my flatmates, my mum, the butcher, the taxi driver, my boss, my students, the little old lady who lived over the road, everyone. As you can imagine, I went around with people avoiding saying anything deeper than “it’s a nice day” or me feeling exposed and empty.
And then I heard this (well, this is my version of it),
If you want to step into Feminine Self Mastery and live your best life, when it comes to sharing your soul you need to remember these three important things:
It is ALWAYS up to you to decide WITH WHOM, HOW MUCH and WHEN you choose to share your heart.
It is always entirely up to you.
Just because someone wants to know something, someone asks you something, or you have something to share, You do not have to share it. You can choose moment by moment with whom you share your heart.
Just because you know someone, or you like someone, or you love someone, it does not mean you have to tell everything that is sacred or tender in your heart to them. You can always choose to what level you share.
Just because you know who you want to share with and how much you want to share with them, it doesn’t mean you have to do it at the first opportunity – um say like at the pickup zone, or in the checkout aisle or when you are in a coffee shop with nosey neighbours. You can choose when it feels safe and sacred for you to share your heart AND that even includes when you are sitting in your sacred women’s circle.
Practising the wisdom of this sentence may sound simple and for many people its a no-brainer. However for mystical sensitive introverted types who know they have to step into leadership, the permission this statement brings can be a Godsend. Learning this sentence and making it an art form has shown me and the hundreds if not thousands of women who I have taught it to, this:
Learning the art of with whom, how much and when, opens an inner blueprint of self-trust and self-respect which then becomes the key to having sacred sisterhood. Because, as we practise in circle…
It is only what you give away that you truly receive.
The more self-love, self-respect, self-care, self-value, self-kindness and self-trust you practice in your heartfelt communicating, the more your capacity to receive and rest in this state will grow.
When you sit in a circle with every woman present also practising this sacred art and you both give and receive this type of heartfelt communication, you will experience a new level of sisterhood. One that is truly sacred. What’s more is you will also know by your own experience your capacity to recreate this depth, transparency and integrity in every relationship you choose. Others may not practise this art, but you do.
This key then becomes a foundation stone for all your relationships and no matter where you are in the world or what is pressing on your heart or asking to be shared ~ you can choose.
With whom, how much and when.
I am starting my own in-person women’s circle Tide Change, in Palm Beach in two weeks time. The Early Bird price ends this Friday, 2nd February. You can book in or read all about it here. We will be practising our sacred key with joy, tenderness and power. If you feel called, please join.